An admirable themed article on Robot6 devotes various recommendations to webcomics that deserves wider recognition.  One of these recent articles gave a glowing with faint praise to a fun adaption of The Wizard of Oz, The Black Brick Road.  While most interpretations of the Emerald city have either been to celebrate it's childish American Fable worldview for a general audience, while remaining faithful to Frank L. Baum's text, or to dwell on adult themes with dark overtones while paying only the barest superficial similarities to the original, this one straddles the line in between.  (Oz Squad being a possible exception) There's still the sense of being lost in a hostile alien fantasy world, with some minor significant changes; Dorthy has amnesia from her crash, Toto is a cat with Heterochromia Iridum,  (Go ahead, look it up), and the Scarecrow has no fear of fire, since there are scarier things out there that he's incapable of scaring off capably.  However, where the review falls flat for me is the denounciation of the video game inserts that "feels tonally out of place with the rest of the webcomic."

It's a sure sign that someone who doesn't see the appeal of silly meaningless games that consists of doing repetitive tasks wouldn't be able to see the attraction of enjoying a slight divergent into a realm that isn't technically a comic, even when they have comic overtones.  As someone who's used to playing games on the computer (as well as reading comics off them), I wasn't as bothered with the sudden shift as the reviewer was.

Rather, it seemed to play on the concept of the "infinite canvas" that Scott McCloud often invoked about
of ReInventing Comics, and much like how the Old Guard is highly resistant to embrace anything new, pretty much any foray into unexplored territory is bound to attract derision.  In fact, there are indy games such as A Duck has an Adventure and Icarus Needs that used the innovative concept of an infinite canvas to create a game along those lines.

You can click around not just the arrows, exploring the strange new world you're in, but also click on the glowing pumpkins, the various scraps of paper lying around, and even the hypodermic needle water(?) fountain.  The only annoying part is having to copy and paste the links in the sidebar below, rather than actually have them appear on the webpage.  But it's a small dividend for such a huge return.  The first noteworthy link goes to a point-and-click adventure where you roam the island that amnesiac Dorthy Gale is stranded on, surrounded by nightmarish candy dolls and all.  By experimenting around, you can find out and eventually stumble upon a shed that's a key figure for the next strip.  The second game is putting various objects in their proper place, while finding various Easter Eggs sprinkled around the room.  Sure, actually "playing" the game isn't a necessary requirement to understanding the story, but it makes the overall immersion that much more enjoyable.

Possibly what the reviewer objected to was being forced to excel at a silly meaningless mini-game in order to proceed, the first one of which was admittedly, not that very well designed.  At least you could bypass that game entirely, compared to the series of Flash animation by Kirbopher, the world of TTA (TV Tome Adventures) that was consisted of DragonBall-inspired fights on a Megaman Battle Network grid.  You'd think that kind of combination wouldn't work, but it manages to work amazingly well.  In between the rounds of action, there are multiple stages of dialogue that can be either pondered over or skipped entirely by clicking the green "play" button on the lower right side of the screen.  Only episodes 025 and 028 would take slightly longer than usual, since they require a kind of memorization and split-second timing in order to see the fights that take place.
Though, like any battle Manga, things don't really start to get interesting until the tournament arc.  (Episodes 14-29, the highlight of the run, spoiled only by a lackluster conclusion and a weak second season)
Interactive comics make the reader feel more involved, and they're more controllable than those animated motion comics with sickening shaky moving panels that tried to make reading the book a visceral and exciting thing to experience.  The problem is, the panels that these comics came from were not regulated to a strict rigid screen, leaving quick panning shots without being able to comprehend what was being shown, and displaying events at a breakneck speed that didn't allow you time to contemplate what's just happened.  The alternative and more reasonable method is to display the action for a while, pausing at key events, allowing the audience to choose their own pace.  Being subjected to the same reading speed as everybody else is along the same lines as Treating Everyone Equally.  Upon first thought, it's a noble cause, but there's a severe drawback to it - not everybody responds to the same level as everybody else, and some need to be accommodated to their special needs.  The ending for the SNES Adams Family is a perfect example.  There are only five screens of dialogue between Mortica and Gomez, taking about 15 seconds each for the reader to read their dialogue.

But this concept of equality is taken to absurd lengths in the last two frames consisting of their classic exchange, which lasts another fifteen seconds, and is longer than what would be considered comfortable.

The Utopian world of City of Reality has several intriguing and unusual Flash comics of thechoose-your-adventure variety that would be extremely difficult to replicate in book form.  The outcome of what happens next can be different depending on when you're coming in.

A later ambitious storyarc had multiple episodes that consisted of a single panel that after clicking the first arrow, the remainder could be seen either by clicking "next", or using the arrow keys, much like various Manga scanlation sites.  (You know where those are)  The ease of access and ability to put the audience in the driver's seat is what compels these people to keep coming back.

Recently, I read the pseudo-autobiography of Shigeru Mizuki, the residential founder of Yokai (Ghost stories) Manga.  While recent reviews of the book seem to garner mostly praise, my perception was more closer to the Comics Reporter's review, which found the book an outright bore, and had to struggle to even finish the damned thing.
While the majority of the narrative focuses on the lead protagonist, the true co-star clearly belongs to the grandmother, Nonnonba, who was a great influence on the young boy, telling ghost stories of folklore that were preserved for future generations.  While every country has their versions of imaginary monsters (even in Australia, which has enough real-life monsters of its own), Shigeru managed to retain the numerous ghost stories of his youth for posterity, which would account for his popularity.  Fairy Tales or urban legends (which are in a way, kind of adult Fairy Tales) are ways for people to make some kind of sense out of the world they're living in.  Here, Shigeru is haunted by Mr. Sticky (who looks like the mascot of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy), the ghost that follows the sound of your sandals.

Sadly, that reputation doesn't seem to apply very well when talking about his life. While Shigeru Mizuki was the founder of Yokai in Japanese Manga, his reputation for stylish storytelling for schlocky horror themes doesn't apply very well as an autobiography.

The bigger problem stems not just from the wandering narrative, which goes nowhere, but also from the over-reliance of stock poses, of characters constantly holding their hands in repetitive fashions.  (There are similar issues with videogame novels)  Here, haggling, delegating responsibility, lavishing praise, looking contemplative, offering helpful advice, recalling fond memories and basically being lost in thought are all drawn with the same stance.

I realize that Japanese society tends to repress outbursts of outlandish behavior (which is why I have issues with their live-action movies failing to convey emotions convincingly), but that same standard shouldn't have to apply in a particularly cartoony-looking Manga like this.  Constantly relying on old poses for everything is just lazy.  While the time period takes place in the 1920s when the latest Western technology and Japanese tradition were still clashing with each other, Shigeru's mother makes a point of referencing to her family history, using the same pose three times.  One could make bonus points for her not snorting out of her nose in the last panel alone, but that would be too generous.

Whether it's from holding their hands in front of them when they talk, rolling their eyes in thought, putting their arms behind their heads, or stroking their chins in contemplation, there's a lot of sameness to the quality of the drawings.  And the constant display of Shigeru's duck lips don't help either.

One suspects that if Shigeru's assistants didn't help work on the heavily detailed backgrounds, he wouldn't be as highly regarded today.

The bigger problem I have is that whenever a Yokai appears, there's no metaphorical meaning behind them.  No attempt is made to differentiate between whether a Yokai appearance is either happening in a child's imagination, a storytelling element or the result of someone's superstition.  (It's very unlikely they would've actually shown up, since only a select few people can verify for their presence, and that's mostly from a biased perspective)

An underused method is to use visual metaphors in autobiographies, as popularized in Maus, which plenty of people seem reluctant to emulate.  But that shouldn't be a deterrence for keeping others from trying.  For instance, Cancer Vixen, has dozens of visual metaphors to get the point across more succinctly than any passage of longwinded prose ever could.  (Yes, I'm aware that DAR made some similar metaphors for the strip below)

The real reason why Nonnonba seems so dissatisfying is that there are other autobiographies out there that have far more imaginative scope than what Shigeru manages here.  As far as visual grandiosity goes, few can manage to hold a candle up to Epileptic, David B.'s masterpiece about his handicapped brother, and the twisting narrative that led to futilely try to find a cure for his condition.  Like Shigeru, David B. is strongly influenced by his Grandparents, even in their absence, which is imagined in the form of bird-like humans.

To put the two in context, in Nonnonba, a Yokai appears during a robbery, but its presence could either mean that the hostage is fainting from the severeness of the situation, or is overwhelmed by the robber's menacing aura.

Where this falls apart is when the hostage wanders off in a bright area, chasing off the shadow Yokai, at which point, he starts feeling better.  The shadow then leeches onto the robber, and only Shigeru and the Grandma can see it, and warn the robber to change his ways.  What exactly we're supposed to get out of this is hardly relevant or clear.

In comparison, in Epileptic, the disease makes itself represented as an armed snake-creature that ensnares around its victim.  In the early French books, the covers are sparingly drawn with several spare monsters
upon a yellow background, until the sixth book when the numerous creatures have crowded out everything else, leaving only the snake-creature visible on the back cover.

Shigeru has numerous conversations with one particular Yokai, the bean-tossing Azuki-Hakari whose wide-smiled wild-haired appearance always appears head on, never in profile.

This isn't too far removed from having literary character avatars as a form of talking to oneself.  And somehow, borrowing elements from The Last Canterbury Tales seems more sophisticated.

Ironically enough, even though  David B. is capable of drawing tense scenes of horrific imagery, when he tries to emulate the feelings that his epileptic brother conveys in him, he finds it an uphill struggle to do so.

Compared to naval-gazing Indy biographies with Woody Allen self-loathing, Manga biographies are largely tame, considering their source material.  Even Junji Ito's Cat Diary, while filled with grotesquely warped faces, is surprisingly charming and adorable, instead of disturbingly scary.  By all rights, autobiographical Manga should be filled with grandiose visual spectacles conveying the emotional turmoil they're going through.  The closest a Manga biography actually manages to convey the artist's vision in a warped mirror of their life is Hideshi Hino's Panorama of Hell.  But the symbolic imagery that's so prevalent in commercial Manga is strangely absent in these self-contained stories.  Furthermore, when groundbreaking authors spill the beans on their deepest darkest secrets, the results are largely toothless.  Even the master of the short story Gekiga format, Yoshihiro Tatsumi's A Drifting Life had the man going through events at the founding of the Manga industry with nary a drama in place.  While this is more true to life in that "living in interesting times" doesn't mean that there's action on every page, the outright sensibility and lack of visual imagery can make reading these works somewhat of a chore.

Especially annoying are Manga biographies of famous people.  When the historic character spouts rousing emotional platitudes that seems meaningful, upon closer observation, they don't really contain much content.  Furthermore, there's no real sense of "getting in their heads", since all analysis of these historic figures are from second-hand observers and admirers.  It's as if they're so scared of offending any sensitivities, that they don't even bother to tread over some of the more interesting or outrageous parts of that person's history. In fact, its those detractions that make the person truly stand out and become alive.

To use another fitting example of expressing unspeakable, indescribable and unnameable horrors, let's use Lovecraft based on the screenplay by Hans Rodionoff, adapted by Keith Giffen, and drawn by Enrique Breccia.  It was originally intended to be made as a movie, but works just as well as a comic.  But first, a minor digression: early on, it's briefly mentioned that he dressed up as a girl in his youth.

While this could be considered gender confusion nowadays, this kind of practice was actually quite common in its day, and brought up well-adjusted boys like the 32nd President of the United States.  With that incongruous explanation out of the way, let's take a look at an unusual bedtime story, a ritual strangely compelled to associate reading books with drowsiness.  (Which despite evidence to the contrary, is not a cause of drops in literacy)

In case you're not familiar with that particular passage, that's because these titles are no longer in print. (Probably for a good reason)  Despite getting night terrors from these stories, Howard is still drawn to an obscure tome called the Necronomicon, despite all attempts from his mother to forbid him from reading the material.  Censorship - a wonderful way to increase readership.

After his grandfather dies from mysterious circumstances, Howard takes his inspiration for storytelling from his grandfather's old stories.  In fact, most of Lovecraft's weird stories are obscure literary references to ancient passages.  He goes on a personal one-man crusade to prevent these unspeakable horrors from ever entering our world by writing about the very creatures that plague his every waking moment.

In Nonnonba, Chigusa, a young girl with an unnamed sickness is reassured by the numerous stories Shigeru makes up.  Same goes for Miwa, another doomed girl who's eventually sold off.  Shigeru creates numerous fantasy worlds in an attempt to cope with their sudden dying and departure at a young age.  Because of his grandma's influence to show the power of stories (such as dressing up as an ogre to chase bullies away), he was able to

In Lovecraft, the protagonist and his wife make a similar (less magical) journey into the realms of Arkham, where all his stories were said to originate from.  This is the pivotal moment of the biography, so spoilers are abound.  Feel free to skip if you have a queasy stomach for gruesomeness and premature revelations.


Then Lovecraft's rational twin makes the novice mistake of saying that "we should find and destroy that book", leaving Lovecraft to wonder that if the man opposite him was him, he would already know where the Necronomicon was.  In the end, he stabs the calm man, who devolves into a reoccurring creature that'd been chasing him all his life.  This can be read as a metaphor where both the fantasy and the reality can exist simultaneously.  Whichever one you decide to believe in is entirely up to the reader.  I know that most would prefer to imagine the more interesting story.

When comparing the movie Life of Pi to the book, I was asked which one I preferred better.  The answer I gave was, "The one with the tiger."

Sometime late last year, I was approached by an Indian fan who wanted to interview me and Minifig for scanlating two Asterix tribute albums from various French artists.  I was suspicious at first, since I'd heard of Nigerian princes asking for confidential information to access their bank accounts, but surely there must be an easier way to gain acceptance than through comic scans.  I checked the man's credentials online, and was surprised to find out that his online essays were better written than his emails.  Maybe he took greater pride of his outward presentation for the world to see than with online correspondence.  I know some people like that.

I decided to test the waters, since I didn't have anything better to do, and if the questions veered into personal territory, I would know to back off.  When I got back a set of questions, they seemed perfectly reasonable, and there was no possible way that any personal information could've been gleamed off those, save my personal opinions.  Having vouched for the veritability of the questions, I went about trying to find my scanlation partner.

The only problem was, I hadn't heard from my co-partner, Minifig for over a year, and he hadn't made his presence known on the internet for quite some time.  I felt bad about being the sole beneficiary of the interview, since I felt I should share the credit with someone who made the bulk effort of the scanlation process.  (Which I can tell you from personal experience is not as easy as it sounds)  At the last minute, I got a reply from one of my sources, and sent the list of questions his way.  After which, I was assigned to proofread an edited version of our questions to make it more palpable for Indian Comixology readers.

That was in mid-November, and I'd hoped to have it up in December so I could show the full questionaire in conjunction with one of my old blog posts about reading lips being made available for a Deaf newsletter. (Page 17)  A month went by, then two.  I contributed another blog post about deafness in movies (Page 13), and still nothing.

I asked the interviewer if he had any idea when our interview would be be shown, since I was becoming increasingly impatient as to when it would be shown.  (Even though I didn't sign a confidentiality agreement, I still felt I owed them that much)  He reassured me, saying that he was sending multiple reminders to the Comixology editors daily, but still wasn't getting any response.  Then, just last week, I got an apology email, saying that after a long delay, it looked like they weren't going to present our interview after all.  If this was a Phishing expedition, it was certainly the most unusual one I've ever been exposed to.

With that longwinded background detail over, here's what would've been the interview:

Greetings from Trivandrum, comic lovers. This time around, I have a special guest- rather, the duo consisting of DanielBT and Minifig who colaborated to translate several European comics into English, including 2 Asterix albums.

For those of you reeling in shock, the above is not a misprint - its not done by the usual team of Anthea Bell and Dereck Hockridge, and the two Asterix albums in question areASTERIX ET SES AMIS (Asterix and his Friends- a tribute to Uderzo) and UDERZO CROQUÉ PAR SES AMIS (Uderzo as Seen by His Friends- a tribute to Uderzo), Asterix parodies done in the signature style of famous European cartoonists.

Don’t bother looking for it on Amazon. These two albums haven't been officially translated to English by the Asterix Publishers. And many Asterix fans in this part of the world had to wait... and wait and wait to see whether this would ever be translated. The scenario looked bleak and that’s when Daniel and Minifig joined hands and decided to translate the two comics... and legions of Asterix lovers are thankful to the duo for their valiant efforts. I had the pleasure and privilege to Interview them, and this is what they had to say:

From Asterix lovers all over India - a special thanks, thank you for translating to English ASTERIX ET SES AMIS and  UDERZO CROQUÉ PAR SES AMIS.

1.      What prompted you take the job of translating European comics-as you put it “mighty translation of European comics”?

Minifig: I was wandering around the convention floor of BICS (British International Comics Show, a now-defunct – and greatly missed - comic book convention) and I noticed a stand from a company called Cinebook. They had exceptionally good offers,which I soon took advantage of – 2 for 3, 1 Lucky Luke album, 1 Clifton and (I think)1 Blake & Mortimer. Unlike most of my impulse convention purchases, I didn't regretit! Soon after, I started seeing a few scanlated Eurocomics being posted on messageboards I was frequenting, and those two things inspired me to learn more about this world of comics that I'd previously been blind to.

DanielBT: Well, I'd been downloading various English scanlations of random European comics that weren't available in Heavy Metal (which as a gateway to European stuff, is mostly devoted to the serious stuff and offers easy wank material, but isn't always to my taste, and the few magazines I own are those I deem having enough quality content worth keeping) when I noticed that there was a surprisingly lack of variety in the choice of certain words, and a high rate of spelling mistakes.  Not to mention the sentence structure was all kinds of wonky from doing nothing more than straight translations without double-checking to verify an alternate use of a word.  Likewise, some French words would be left entirely untranslated, leaving a gaping hole in someone's sentence, and causing confusion to the reader.  (i.e. me)  I was going mad with these annoying gaffes, and would go about and edit them in the privacy of my home, when it occurred to me that I could simply cut straight to the middleman and bring my complaints to the translators themselves.  Besides, the only one benefiting from my edits was me, and I wasn't sharing my results with anyone, so why should others suffer from easily preventable mistakes?

Most of these translations were being done by people whose first language wasn't English, so they were completely unaware of the kinds of mistakes that could've been easily preventable.  Sometimes it was the usage of slang that would slip them up, and they would be unaware of an English equivalent.  One example would be the 7th volume of Game Over: "Only For Your Eyes", when it would sound better as "For your Eyes Only".  In some cases, it's a simple matter of rearranging words around so they'll sound better.  In other cases, it's not knowing which proposition to use.

One thing that I'm sorry I didn't include in my blog post about European translations was a tip to compare the translation of a well-known American property, such as Maus or V for Vendetta, or even Calvin & Hobbes, and see how even the most colourful slangy sentence can be reduced to a rather static flow of repetitive words.  For instance, lower-class swears such as "Oh Bloody Hell", "Goodness Sake", and "Goddamn" can all be translated into French as "Mon Dieu".

Once you begin to see how a quote can be pared down to the basic elements, you can reverse-engineer a commonly-said word into something that won't be limited to stock catchphrases.  These words are fine when used in moderation, but when they're used all the time, it becomes somewhat tiring, and smacks of repetition.  It's the difference between relying on a "KYAA!" and an "Eeek!" for a girlish scream.  As the saying goes, "If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail".

Since I've pointed out these niggling details, I'm please to note that there's been an uptick of quality from various translators who I haven't personally proofread.  It's somewhat amazing that I'm able to help out at all, since I have barely a basic knowledge of French, and all my personal translation projects comes from retyping the entire sentence on GoogleTranslate and trying to decipher their results in a coherent manner that makes sense.


2.      How did you guys happen to meet?

DanielBT: Well, it was somewhat of a happy coincidence.  I started out by pointing out various spelling mistakes on a blog that was translating the 2nd and 3rd albums of Violine (a girl with purple eyes who can read people's minds by looking in their eyes), and wanted to improve the quality of the text.  Surprisingly enough, the translator was happy to receive my input, and I was able to help out to the album's completion.  We hoped to continue with the remaining two books, but other side projects kept getting in the way, and the translator's been kinda busy with other stuff, and hasn't had much time after I've helped proofreading Fabrice Tarrin's blog comics.  I hope to get back to Violine someday.

Anyways, from there, I offered my services to anyone who would be glad to accept my harsh criticism. Minifig showed up on a plus4chan page that was full of English translations projects, and when he mentioned that he was working on an Asterix book, but he hadn't heard back from a proofreader, I offered to lend my services in his direction, but was reluctant to give my contact information for the world to see, and suggested he log in on a comic forum I was acquainted with, and things expanded from there.  He wasn't even aware of a second Asterix parody/tribute book until I mentioned it.

Minifig:  I'd  already  completed Asterix et ses Amis when DanielBT offered his services; I'd been having trouble with one joke in particular that I couldn't figure out. I had been offered help with proofreading before, but the original volunteer never got back to me. He also introduced me to Uderzo, which was a surprise to me - I thought I'd  already dealt with Albert's old birthday presents well before his 90th birthday!  However, I welcomed the challenge, as working to a deadline means you're a lot more productive.

3.      How does the work process of translating the comics go?

Well, Minifig did the main bulk of translating the comics while sending me a copy of the French original so I could check for punctuation and word usage.  My aim in cleaning up the English version is to portray a version that comes as close to the original without betraying anything that could be lost, and choosing words that'll match the action on the page.  The tricky part is finding words that'll fit in the balloons, and making sure space isn't too cramped, which can result in some creative rewriting to remain as faithful as possible.  I also double-check to make sure that any dialogue isn't missing.  I've had to deal with more than one blank balloon.  You'd be surprised how often it comes up.  I once had a page (not Minifig's) that had ALL the dialogue blanked out, and I wondered if that was how it was supposed to appear.  The correct version showed up in the next installment, but fortunately the damage was caught before it was released to the public.  One could only imagine the amount of confusion that would've resulted otherwise.

I can't speak for how Minifig's translation process went, but from the notes from our correspondence, his philosophy was that in the instances where he deliberately skewed from the text on the page to implement his particular brand of humour (which I objected to) since he was following the same model as Ted Woolsey for creating silly sentences that skewed far from the source material, but didn't necessarily improve on the joke.

There was an instance where Minifig used the word "pot" for one of the comics, but I suggested the proper use of "cauldron", since it was the term used in the Asterix books, even if it meant scrunching up the dialogue on the page.  One thing I would've liked when these corrections were being done was to have the same font used again.  It might be undetectable to the casual reader, but these little inconsistencies really stick out in my craw.  Of course, considering my method for finding a matching font is to type a typical sentence besides the original, then scroll through the entire list until I find a close match without bothering to take notes, so its perfectly understandable why Minifig didn't go the extra mile.

An unseen first draft of the page in question.

Minifig:  I  translate  on  a  panel-by-panel  basis,  using  Google  Translate  for  every sentence (It's not a perfect tool, so sometimes I use Reverso for specific words). Next,I edit out all the original text, then I start typing in my translation. I generally use Google Translate as a rough guide; as I said, it's not a perfect translation tool, and I usually have to reword what I've been given into something an actual human being would say. Sometimes, I can translate a sentence purely by sight alone. I sometimes have to tweak things here and there, usually the font size. I use Paint.NET for editing images - I find it a nice halfway house between Photoshop's breadth and versatility and Microsoft Paint's utilitarian functionalism. When I'm done with a few pages, I send my work to DanielBT, who points me in the right direction. I tend to get a little self-indulgent, and he's very good at making me adhere more to the actual story, not how I wish the story to be.


4.      I am curious about the username Minifig- tell us something about the man/woman behind this strange name?

DanielBT: You'll have to ask him.  It could be a short combination of Mini figurines, but until he shows up to clarify otherwise, we'll never know for sure.

Minifig: I'm afraid it's a rather dull story – I was getting into the Lego Star Wars games, which rekindled my love of all things Lego. I learnt that the little Lego people are called "minifigures", or "minifigs" for short. I thought it sounded nice, so I started using it for a username. And now you know the rest of the story!

5.      Now, as I understand what you are attempting is independent translation of comics done purely out of passion for comic lovers. Do you ever wonder if the actual publishers may create trouble in any way?

Minfig: It's not unheard of. I heard of some brouhaha with Shueisha and some Narutoscanlators a while back, and Disney removed some pages of a fan translation  of PKNA. However, I don't think that the majority of scanlators have too much to worry about, especially eurocomics scanlators – most of what we translate isn't going to get an official release any time soon. Asterix et ses Amis was a perfect example of that - when I started reading it, I was thinking "Why hasn't this gotten an official release?" and then when I saw the story where Donald Duck and Gyro Gearloose take Asterix and Obelix to Duckberg I thought "Oh, that's why..." - an official release would be nice, but realistically it's too much of a legal nightmare to even contemplate.

DanielBT: That's the basic question that's been plaguing the Manga industry, which has its own dilemma from having TOO MANY titles available, often with similar plots, so its the ones with the most outrageous art and stories that stick out from the crowd that get the most attention.  Mostly, it's the current long-running titles such as Naruto, Bleach and One Piece that's had the highest number of interested fans wanting to see the newest installment which hasn't hurt their sales or popularity one iota.  There's been talk about shutting down these sites down for ages, but as long as fans keep somehow finding early releases of these titles, one cease and desist order will just spring up a dozen imitators elsewhere.

Nowadays, its these properties that get widely pirated that get the highest interest rate among the audience even as Hollywood openly decries against such practices.  The irony is that those movies and TV shows that are widely shared via bittorrent are those that are also the the most bought for personal use.  You'd think that after having tasted a free sample, you'd be content with having gotten a story for free, but that hasn't been the case here.  The audience having had a taste of a quality piece of merchandise feel more assured that they're getting something worth keeping and want something for posterity.  whereas other properties that flounder about in obscurity shows the extent of audience interest in certain titles.  That kind of data is extremely valuable to companies who want to know where their customer's tastes lie.  The more used you become to certain artwork and stories, the more likely you're willing to spend money on them.  I get the sense that European artists would love to see their old work get wider distribution outside their country, which couldn't hurt their recognition factor.

It makes sense if you think about it - you're normally reluctant to try something new, even if your closest friends praise it to the skies as do so many reviews of a stellar book, you get the feeling that they're trying to sell you something that's basically "TRY this new dishwater!  You'll LOVE it!" Especially daunting are long long long works that take awhile before they become worthy of the hype, which because of their slow buildup, can be something of an acquired taste.  It also speaks that people are more likely to revist their favorite comics they read as a kid, so implanting these various kinds of comics early on can't help but broaden their horizons.

The difference between Manga and BD is fairly wide.  Manga has hundreds of pages in black and white, but mostly large balloons, which gives you a feeling of accomplishment when you finish editing pages in a rapid manner.  Whereas, BD have colour pages (which take longer to scan) and plenty of dialogue throughout and becomes something of an uphill struggle where you feel relieved just to finish one page, with more to go.
The closest comparison would be old-school Mangas with their numerous amount of talking panels per page.  Given the amount of dedication and work needed to put out a quality work, I wouldn't be surprised if the burnout rate was fairly high.

I think what the real concern over is, is that people will grow more accustomed to stealing stuff online rather than actually purchasing the things themselves.  Food produce manages to overcome this hurdle by giving out free samples of their fares, but I don't know how far that analogy comes when it comes to telling stories.  Unless there's material that'll make more sense upon rereading, once you've got the general gist, there's not much point in going back and checking for clues.


6.      How do you guys decide which work deserves to be translated?

Minifig: It's either a random choice ("Ooh, this looks cool!") or pure nostalgia ("Hey, Johan & Peewit! I remember them from The Smurfs cartoon!"). I then ask around, to see if anybody plans on translating it, or if it's any good. If it's "No" to the former and "Yes" to the latter, then I get to work.

DanielBT: After we finished with the Asterix books, there was an online poll regarding which other projects people would be interested in us doing next.  The turnout was rather disappointingly low, with votes for Ric Hochet, one for Johann & Peewit, and some redundant requests for Clifton, even though Cinebook was doing those.  The whole purposoe of scanlations was to bring publicity to comic titles that might not be otherwise known.  We wound up doing the first album of Johan and Peewit, and two albums of Michel Valiant, which wasn't entirely to my taste.

Some titles I wouldn't mind proofreading would include the remaining SODA albums, Spoon & White, Pauvre Lampil, Sentai School, Pacush Blues, later albums of Les Jungles Perdues, or pretty much anything that looks potentially interesting.  Of course, I'd have to find someone willing to work with me for that.  I contemplated doing the solo tribute to Lucky Luke, Rocky Luke, but the amount of photoshopping of certain pages scared me off, (I mainly use Paint) and I haven't made much progress since.


7.      Now in India - European comics means Asterix and Tintin. There is a huge fan following for Goscinney-Uderzo and Herge. Now that Asterix has been finished, will you be now turning to the works of these two legends which have not yet been translated to English??  Haute Tension is the only work in the Quick and Flupke series not to have been translated to English; and Mr. Mops.,  Mr. Bellum, etc. still have not got English translation. Same with Goscinney /Uderzo’s other works like Luc Junior and Jehan Pistolet have not been yet translated to English.  Would the  “Mighty Translation” team take the wishes of Indian comic lovers in consideration?

DanielBT: I had no idea that there were English copies of Quick & Flupke in India, but since sales and knowledge of that series is so abysmally low here, they might as well not exist.  There was a fan attempt to translate some volumes as well as some comics that were left out, but I don't know how that panned out.

There would have to be some kind of outside demand for this kind of material.  It's the catch-22 situation where there's worthy historical comics by cartoonists before they became famous, but they can't be made available if there isn't demand for them, and there won't be any demand until they become available.  Its the factor of not knowing what the audience wants that they don't even know what they want.  Then there's the possibility of their old stuff not appealing to today's readers.  Dr. Slump was passed over here, because of its gag Manga format and overreliance on poop jokes.  (Even now, scanlations haven't progressed past the 6th volume)  As for Herge and Uderzo's lesser-known works, I'm afraid I'm not knowledgeable enough about them to help out there.  But if there are any aspiring translators willing to work on them, I'd be happy to lend a helping hand.

Minifig: The main problem is that Europe has an embarrassment of hidden riches, as far as the comics scene is concerned – there  are many beloved series going back decades. I've already attached myself to a handful of these classics: Johan & Pirlouit, Professor Palmboom, Ric Hochet, Michel Vaillant... the problem with being a kid in a sweet shop is that if you try to eat everything you see, you'll make yourself sick.

Fortunately, there are more Eurocomic scanlators now than there were when I first started – I've occasionally come across somebody who knows some French, but doesn't know where to start, so I point them in the direction of older comics. There's also the question of available scans; Europeans are less comfortable with the idea of scanning their own comics, as they consider them to be works of art, or at least view them with more than a little nostalgia. We're very lucky that so many Europeans have decided to sacrifice their own collections so that we all can enjoy them. At the end of the day, the best way to get classics translated is to let publishers know that you want to see series like Jehan Pistolet and Quick & Flupke translated. The main reason a story isn't published is because the people in charge think the story won't sell. Raising awareness can be the best way to get what you want!

8.      Have you ever thought of starting your own comic, or are you satisfied staying as unsung hero for scanlators?

Minifig: I've toyed with a few ideas, but I've not been able to expand on them in any meaningful way. I think I might need to find more time to work on both scanlating and writing...

DanielBT:  Oh, I've had all kinds of comic ideas just waiting to be jotted down.  I've written several drafts that have yet to be completed.  My desk is full of little pieces of paper of written notes taken from dreams and daydreams and anything that strikes my fancy that I've yet to organize in a coherent manner resembling a proper narrative.  The problem basically stems from a lack of motivation from nobody to spur me on.  Not to mention minor annoyances such as constant interruptions to schedule conflicts and not feeling like writing when I'm anxious.  I basically have to be persuaded into writing, and apart from outside influences, I'm unlikely to finish a personal project anytime soon.  I'm a terrible self-motivator without a deadline.

The main obstacle comes from finding an artist whose artwork I feel can properly convey the worlds I have in my head.  I worry about my vision becoming squandered by the artist's limited ability to show the full range of my imagination, or me failing to take advantage to the artist's main strengths and wasting their time.

When there was the announcement of a program where you could virtually "Make your own Manga", I was potentially excited, until I actually had a chance to use a sample of the program in question, and found it somewhat limiting.  It was more suited for 4-panel comics, with stock character bodytypes in typical school settings, which limited the amount of subject material and variety somewhat.  Even the wider Manga page was composed of straight borders, without allowing for crooked borders or even collage collapsible panels typical of Shoujo Mangas.  Then there was the constant zooming in and out of their poses and the word balloons were oftentimes larger than I would've personally wanted, which was something of a pain.  I understand there are people who are satisfied with this kind of thing, but it's simply not for me.

This is further hampered by only allowing a small portion of my writing to be seen among a select number of people I trust.  And short of posting them on my blog or a site like Fanfiction.net, they're unlikely to garner much attention unless I display a fair amount of publicity, and I'm loath to do much cross-promotional advertising.  Besides, I'm forever constantly rewriting my work, and worry about releasing an inferior product to the world until I'm completely 100% satisfied.  Considering my impossibly high bar of quality, and how nervous I am about showing my work to anyone, and the distraction of video games gobbling up my time, I worry that I may never get a chance to show my writings until I overcome these fears.

The majority of comics I've contributed to Square Root of Minus Garfield is just the barest fraction of the scope of my creativity.  But that's basically taking the template of an already popular character and running with it as far as my imagination goes.  I want to be able to explore concepts with characters of my own making.

9.      Asterix and the Picts is coming our this month - with new artists and writers behind the creation. How do you see the future of Asterix without Goscinney and Uderzo?

Minfig: When I read about the decision, I wasn't surprised. They've been trying to revitalize the Asterix franchise for years, with varying levels of success.  Albert Uderzo's 86 years old now, so it's only natural that he wants to step down – he's done everything he wanted to do. Eurocomics are handled differently to franchises owned by Marvel and DC; instead of any available artists and writers being put on whatever's going stale, you're more likely to be attached to a character for life. I don't envy Jean-Yves Ferri, because he's got some immense shoes to fill, but I'm willing to give him a chance to prove himself.

DanielBT:  Well, the last few books by Uderzo were disastrously abysmal from a storytelling perspective, even as the art remained spot on.  The last book which was basically a gallery of the Asterix gang in various artistic interpretations along with background commentary from the gallery was acceptable ONLY if you looked at the pictures and ignored the text entirely.  So any replacement could be nothing but an improvement.

However, just by looking at the new cover alone, I'm not holding out much hope.  The body positions look unnaturally stiff compared to the fluid energy of Uderzo's pen, and are emblematic of replacement artists doing their best to emulate a style that's not their own.  [Addendum - apart from looking through the French copy, and finding it was slightly above par - not that good, but not that bad - I still haven't actually read the English version, so my opinion is still unfounded]

The animated movies haven't helped much, because instead of an Asterix who's capable of wit and only using his Magic Potion when he's extremely frustrated or at the end of his rope, we get an Asterix with the personality of Bugs Bunny with a winged helmet in place of bunny ears.  Asterix has basically become a franchise not unlike the Simpsons whose popularity continues to chug along its own energy despite the lack of enthusiasm surrounding the brand, and appeals to fans wanting to recapture its glory days when it took satirical barbs at themes that resonated throughout the ages.  Those early strips with Goscinny at the helm are revered for a reason.  Uderzo managed to hold up until Asterix & The Magic Carpet when he started to go downhill.

In terms of speed, it's gone from Mach 5 to Mach 3, but even at reduced speed, it's still going fast enough for investors to want to continue going with it, and fans keep going back to it because like The Simpsons, it's comfort food that we keep gulping down, even if it tastes terrible simply because it's what we're used to from our childhood, and will undoubtedly sell over a hundred million copies.  Our only hope is that the "Political commentary" attached to the story approaches satirical levels along the levels of Obelix & Co. and not Asterix & the Falling Sky.  Until then, we'll just have to wait and see.

One thing that it occurred to me that was missing in the Asterix tribute books would be something from Peyo's successor.  It wouldn't be entirely out of place if Fisher Smurf and Handy Smurf got into an argument over the smell of fish, which would wind up involving the whole village getting into an argument, with Brainy Smurf acting as the neutral party (yet still getting bound and gagged to a tree) with Grouchy Smurf on the sidelines saying "I HATE fish!" while Papa Smurf would wonder what trivial issue his beloved Smurfs were fighting over now.  (At least he'd have the sensibility not to introduce Magic Potion to these blue-skinned elves)

10.  What's next for you both?

DanielBT: Apart from hearing back from the other scanlators who've been busy with other stuff, and my personal blog updates the future's pretty much unknown until other interested parties say otherwise.

Minifig: I'm currently working on another Michel Vaillant album; the characters may be absurdly verbose, but there's an ineffable charm to the whole thing that draws me inevery time. I won't finish it until I'm 103, but that's what labours of love do to you...

All the best for the same - and on this note, I think we can end this chat. We hope to see from you the translations of Luc Junior, Jehan Pistolet, Mr. Mops, and the hitherto untranslated works by Goscinney- Uderzo and Herge. Thank you for joining us and be sure of the constant pestering from Indian comic lovers.

June 1 - Thorn's Law of Martial Bliss: The length of the marriage is inversely proportional to the cost of the wedding.

June 4 - Hughes' Burned Lawn Axiom: Grass growing from sidewalk cracks never turns brown.

June 12 - Murphy's Theory of Automotives: It's not a question of if the car will break down, but when the car will break down.

June 14: Flag Day - Todd's Political Principle: No matter what they're telling you, they're not telling you the whole truth.

June 16: Father's Day - Femo's Law of Auto Engine Repair: If you drop something, it will never reach the ground.

June 18: Napoleon Defeated at Waterloo 1815 - Maah's Law: Things go wrong so they can go wrong.

June 23/30: Secret Service Established 1860 - Law of Human Quirks: Everybody wants to be noticed, but no one wants to be watched.

June 27 - Theory of Selective Supervision: The one time you lean back and relax is the one time the boss walks by.

A recent comic article brought up the question of whether there would ever be any groundbreaking sprite comics along the likes of the trailblazers 8-Bit Theater and Bob & George.

While there haven't been any notable sprite comics since the big two, working on two affectionate parodies (Megaman and Final Fantasy I), there were still a large number of amusing sprite comics out there, most of them (still) being available on Bob and George.  My favorite strips being the following:

Bishounenman (The adventures of pretty male robots and the friends and foes they encounter)

Kefka's Comics (Insane comics from a Kefka enthusiasist)

Author Wars (A gathering of multiple sprite comic authors, on a madcap chase after an elusive Golden Moogle in the same vein as It's a Mad Mad Mad Mad World, or Rat Race for modern audiences)

Dr. Lowe's Lab (a Mad Scientist does random experiments.  Hijinks ensues)

Jailhouse Blues (Wily is Jailed yet again, yet manages to build 8 robot masters within the confines of his prison, which Megaman has to fight off after being framed himself)

Oddball Fancomics (Fancomics on par with Bob&George)

Warped Reality (A gathering of Robot Masters at Wily's Base turns into a road trip and... things happen.  Like most sprite comics, it's kinda hard to describe)

Back then, Sprite Comics were subject to heavy derision for blatantly stealing licensed artwork and making what should've been a labourous process, the act of cartooning easy for those who couldn't draw.  All that was needed for an aspiring writer who could simply add text to the sprite without having to show any artistic merit.  Though some like Taco: the Comic and Megaverse would occasionally have handdrawn art in their comics, in a veiled tribute for Bob and George's intention to start out as a drawn comic, though their artistic skills were of higher quality than David's.

Another worthy webcomic that managed to have separate sprite comics and hand-drawn comics would be The Rogue's Gallery, which had various comics, ranging from Author Space and The Fallout Shelter, most of them focusing on the abuse of Cream the Rabbit.  (Stick with the drawn stuff, such as 
All Plots Aside - they're better)

On one hand, this was a more visual form of Fanfiction, which would update regularly to keep their audience engaged, and garner interest.  Furthermore, the appeal of a consistent webcomic was seeing what zany oneupmanship the author would come up with next.  And much like many fanfictions, a lot of early Sprite Comics were terrible.  Some blatantly ripping off what made Bob & George successful without bothering to explore other realms.  Others being a kaleidoscopic mess along the likes of Dogaland Adventures, throwing whatever handy sprites were lying around and fooling with Photoshop all the time.

Finding a well-written well-created sprite comic was pretty much digging into a pile of crap to find that elusive flawed jewel hidden somewhere in the muck.  Also, there were instances of overwriting, filling in more text than would be considered helpful, Captain SNES being the worst offender.  (Almost 1000 strips later, and we're no closer to finding out how the Captain got himself jailed, let alone who he's been narrating the events of his adventures and multiple tangents to)  The only instances where a Sprite Comic would have space to breath would be for dramatic or humouristic effect, and these instances would be far between.  Rereading these often disjointed plot elements striving to come to a thematic conclusion without covering all the plot holes is now something of a chore.  The split screen arc of Bob's invasion in the Month of Destruction was revolutionary for its time, giving two separate storylines simultaneously, but rereading it now gives me a headache.

For the most part, working on a sprite comic was basically having fun with the format, usually taking heavily influenced elements, such as making the main character an idiot, references to ingesting large amounts of sweets or alcohol, and author inserts whenever possible.  People were flexing their creative muscles without really thinking or planning how things would turn out, striving close to the game they were parodying, which was as little more than exercising the form as best as they could comprehend.  In most cases, the few who managed to finish their first major arc wound up carrying that momentum onto their second... which would be where their creative process inevitably stalled.

Playing and enjoying the storylines in Video Games was something significantly different from creating comics based on those games that would veer off in alternate directions.  Once they went down a certain path of a story they didn't create, they found it difficult to add to the process, most of it having been written by someone else.  As the old saying goes, if you want to tell the different between a storyteller and a plagiarist, simply have both of them continue the story.  The one who put the most thought into the story would come up with all kinds of elements that were left out that wouldn't even be considered by others in the first place.

Somewhere along the way, the author simply either ran out of steam or found the process more labour-inducing than fun, and eventually stopped.  Whether from intervention of having to focus on their school lessons or getting scholarly degrees or getting paying jobs, for one reason or another, real life infringing on their creative process was a major contribution.

As a result of inactivity, many sprite comics have been lost to the ages of time.  One particularly impressive Flash animation I remember was a duel between Nate and Mynd, which would have two complete different outcomes depending on which one you chose to fight and win.

Even so, going through sprite comics shouldn't be a deterrent, considering how funny they can be.  The lack of an ending for many of these comics is a sore point, since who would want to read a story without knowing how it all turns out?  A happy exception to this would be Megaman: The Lost Chronicles, which I always think of as SnakeMan's comics, who despite being shown as an author avatar, manages to keep mostly off the sidelines.

What if the postal service was slow?

While there are plenty of webcomics mentioned thereabouts, I'd like to mention some of my favorites that aren't covered on TVtropes.

One of the earliest sprite comics was Odd Quest, which started off with a Final Boss fight against the one creature that's constantly Link's bane:


This was simply supposed to be a prelude, narrated by the hero, now an old man, relating his destiny to his grandchildren who would be the new RPG heroes of the next generation.


Later, like any writer ashamed of their silly first drafts, the author tried to redo the strip from the start, so it would be more serious later down the line, having the Chicken become more of a reoccurring villain, but how could you possibly improve upon that opening?

After a beginning like that, anything extra would just spoiling the taste.  What could you possibly add to that???

While many sprite comics went the way of the dodo, their domain addresses expiring from lack of use, there are still several worthy ones among us.

Neko's House is one of the more uniquely designed webcomics out there, about a ruggedly handsome man surrounded by a harem of bountiful cat-girls.  (I didn't say it was original)  The more attractive element is the ongoing relationship between Meowth and Tailmon (Better known as Gatomon, for reasons specifically spelled out below)   The only negative factor in the website is that there's no easy way to navigate through the multiple comics, each popping up into a new tab window, and some are vertical and some are horizontal, which plays havoc with your screen preferences.  Despite these niggling faults, the writing is sharp and spot on, and the character designs are attractive.

Then there's Xardion Comics, which has a small collection of What-ifs, and two storylines (one sadly incomplete), but its most remarkable feature is Chibifying Robot Masters into Mets.

The closest any sprite comic went to creating an epic recreation of an RPG would be Secret of Mana Theater, which has numerous flash animations (and multiple Easter Eggs) of the beginning of the SNES Mana game, which output slowed down to a crawl when **SPOILER ALERT** it diverged greatly from the main plot, and had the main character killed.

On the lighter side but equally ambitious is Chrono Trigger Rip-Off, a crossover between Chrono Trigger and Final Fantasy IV, based on the Final Fantasy Chronicles Playstation disc.

These were seasoned veterans joining up with Cecil and Co. when they were just getting started.
Since FF4 has a reputation for being one of the hardest of the Final Fantasy series (so hard that they released an easy version, so as not to scare curious players off, unlike some other old-school RPGs out there), so Chrono and Company being there creates all kinds of unintended consequences, such as Tellah dying early and Magus taking over the role of the antagonist from Golbez.

Another notable comic would be Oldskooled, which took place in a bar where 8-bit stars hanged out, not unlike a certain sitcom show that I never saw.  As such, with so many stars around, there's bound to be a certain odd man out who'd be derided for their game because of its unforgiving difficulty and anticlimax boss which, until the 3DS remake, was hardly something of a classic.

Two comics I managed to save that are no longer available but are here for anyone interested can download them by clicking the titles, though chances are there may be a few comics missing, since I only saved the ones I thought were the best and most relevant.

Wily's Lab, was about Dr. Wily abusing one of his employees once too often, and he broke off and formed his own evil association, which wound up being more successful than Wily's.  In drowning his sorrows in defeat, Wily in a drunken binge, somehow managed to craft himself a Megaman Power suit so he could rightfully take back his Taking over the World schtick.

Sonic ARGH was a Sonic the Hedgehog comic gone horribly wrong, with all kinds of perversions going on, ranging from beating Knuckles up to getting involved with the porn industry.  At least it gets points for including the cleverest "cute" name for kneeing someone into the balls:

Another honourable mention I'd like to include is Zero Hour, which like many sprite comics, is no longer available, but this blog entry's getting long enough already.

Perhaps like all once-popular things, this is something that needs to hide away in obscurity until the format reuses itself again.  Until such a hypothetical time comes, here's a handy tutorial for creating sprite comics that still seems relevant today.

 

It's not unusual for cartoon characters, once they grow popular to stop doing their bad habits so as not to influence younger children.  Like so many others, Broom Hilda had a tendency to drink beer and smoke cigars in her early strips.  But sometimes it takes time for other bad habits to completely fade away, especially if they're in the realm of visual slapstick.  One of the things that seems to have been phased out recently is that she was capable of crash landings that would make Launchpad McQuack proud.

Even though she no longer drinks beer onscreen, that's possibly a facade.  It's subtle, but the basic gist that the reason Broom Hilda keeps crashing is because she always does a lot of drinking (partying) before flying home.  There's simply no other way to interpret it.

Also, like any drunk, the problem is always somebody else's fault, never their own.

Douglas Addams described flying as aiming at the ground and missing.  In this Broom Hilda fails spectacularly.

Even her friends attempt at intervention (not actually standing up to her and convincing her she's got a problem - they don't want to be zapped into oblivion) don't amount to much.

You'd think that a broomstick rider with a high record of drunken crashing into mountaintops would be hesitant to ride along with her, but that doesn't turn out to be the case.

Even when she doesn't wind up crashing upon impact (we've never actually seen her land, so like recent sightings of Bigfoot, we'll have to take their existence of safe landings as pure hearsay) they still wind up in unfavorable outcomes.

The curious thing is that despite Gaylord being a bird, and Broomie a witch, there are instances where either are shown to be riding airplanes.  But this could be another instance of writer-selective amnesia, since episodic strips like these don't demand total consistency, which I'll point out later.

When she's not using her face as an airbag, smashing her broomstick to toothpicks, she's falling off her transportation household cleaner.

The above is an aberration, since she doesn't often engage in daredevil tactics without a reliable safety net that knows how to count.  Most often, it comes from not having a firm grip on her handle, or being too careless, which could be chalked up to either drunkenness or old age.  Take your pick.

As can be seen here, Broom Hilda has no resistance for aiming at a pool full of water, which makes the next installment more perplexing:

When I first read this, I had no idea why Broom Hilda was so terrified because there were instances where she took baths without much fuss, so this is something of a CIDU for me.  However, this may be down to personal preference, since Broom Hilda has certain standards of her own:

Of all the soft places to land, this one is probably the worst.  Though in other instances, she's been comparatively lucky:  Comparatively being the key word.

On the rare occasions where she manages to succeed at a soft landing, these incidents rarely turn out to be fortunes of fate, resulting in delayed reaction disasters in the making.

In real life, falling from such a height would rarely turn out to a happy ending.  So on this parting note, here's a favorable outcome for such a dangerous method of going as the Old Crow flies.

Well, happy for one side.  No good deed goes unpunished.

Bonus content - your out-of-context panel for today!

In honour of National Garbage Day, here's a tribute to the profession what Opus the Penguin called a "Waste-Management Artisan".  There aren't that many garbagemen in the funny pages, Dilbert's guest appearances by the smartest garbageman being a rare exception.  In the early days, Abercrombie and Fitch, were an obvious allusion to the famous clothing store, but are hardly known today.  (Or maybe they've shown up sporadically.  I haven't read Hi & Lois in years)

According to the Best of Hi & Lois book, Ambercrombie was a connoisseur garbageman and extremely fussy about what people threw away, claiming that they weren't sufficient enough to be carried in the confines of his garbage truck.  He only accepted quality garbage, see.  Anything less would be considered an insult to his profession.

Considering the rapidity and speed needed for the profession, going from house to house for blocks on end, you'd wonder how they'd have any time to chat with any of their clients (I hesitate to use the term customer) since they're hardly the only ones who need their curbs cleaned of refuse.  Do other houses get psychoanalyzed to this extent?

While we don't think much about sanitation works (if at all), it's mostly from their doing what amounts to the invisible chore cleaning the house.  No one notices their absence until they go on strike, since dealing hundreds of trash on the curb certainly is quite daunting in more ways than one.  It seems somewhat fitting that after a customary obscure holiday thanking garbagemen for the thankless task of taking away refuse, they'd be more likely to find throwaway cards in the very containers they're carrying out.

Following up from my previous post are more stuff ripped from the headlines that reminded me of comics, or if not outright comics, then certain photomanipulations.


Recently in Quebec, there was a woman on trial who inadvertently stopped her car in the middle of the highway, causing a traffic accident of a motorist and his daughter, resulting in the deaths of two people.
The reason she stopped the car in the middle of a highway at night was to stop for - get this - baby ducks.
According to the woman, she was concerned about these ducklings who were wandering at night with no mother, and wanted to take them home with her.  Too bad that she neglected to leave her rear lights on, and left her door open in her attempt at preserving wildlife.

A revamp to the criminal code in 2007 changed the verdict of people charged with criminal intent from doing community service to outright "Go straight to jail", even if they have no criminal past.  The difference was that Emma Czornobaj had no malicious intent.  In any other context, what would have been considered a traffic accident was inflated to a maximum sentence of fourteen years.  It's frankly the first time anything of this scope has ever happened here, and the judge's phrasing of the law to the jury means that a rewrite of the laws may be considered necessary.  Hopefully, she'll get a lenient sentence when her jail term's pronounced in August, barring an appeal.


It's been 25 years since the protest at Tiananmen Square, and since then, the people have had a rash of collective amnesia about the events that took place.  Apparently, everyone was embarrassed about the kinds of things they did, which was totally acceptable at the time, such as ratting out friends or family members who might've been influenced by "outside interests".  If it didn't originate in China, it was deemed a danger to the fabric of society, and had to be squashed down at all costs.  Now that China's gone from a Communist to a Capitalist country, where chances are you're using a product you're that's probably Made in China (yet ironically, they're also the largest exporter of bootlegs)

The definitive symbol of student rebellion is summed up by the image of a lone man standing up to a row of tanks which was actually a cropped version of a whole street of tanks, stretching down several blocks.  Not unlike the collection of zoomed out famous landmarks giving a more impressive sense of scale.

The unknown man who stood single-handedly against this throe of impressive military machinery clutching nothing more than a grocery bag was a hero for the ages, until he was dragged off by well-wishers who didn't want to see him made a greasy smear on the pavement.  But if we zoom in closer, we can make out some significant features that're remarkable in the absence of significance - mainly how plain and blank-looking he is:



As much of a classic Roger Rabbit is, there's been talk of trying to do a sequel (or prequel) to the movie, which would be quite the feat, considering the heights it reached back when animation was considered little more than a dying art form.  Looking back at it, what makes the movie stand out more than the impressive animation techniques, is how strongly the story holds up.  All the plot points and clues and diversions are there, sprinkled about amidst the impressive array of visual jokes.  Even with today's technology, it's difficult to think of a story that would be able to do the film that could do it justice, and not just another cheapquel. While there are familiar noir elements throughout, it's the human element that helps it stand out, and makes it stronger, even as toons are bounding along the scenery.  Something that's sadly forgotten in lackluster ripoffs such as Cool World and Space Jam which relied mostly on their animation to attract audiences. Nowadays, that kind of visual eyecandy is mostly replaced by CGI which is easier to overlay, rather than painstakingly draw animated cels onto every film frame.

Of course, it'd probably be better if the movie was left untouched, since it would sully the reputation of an otherwise flawless experience.  Barring an exceptional script that'd improve upon the original, which was based on a loose homage to Chinatown (both dealing with a dour private detective, a noble femme fatale, and a corrupt judge), there's not much official demand for a licensed property that proved successful once.  Hollywood has a tendency to attempt recapturing lightning in a bottle, leaving either lightning or the bottle out of the equation.

It's been such a long time that Bob Hoskins died before a sequel could be made, and finding a suitable replacement would be an uphill task.  Especially since the reputed British actor was actually driven mad by the presence (or absence) of the cartoon rabbit to the point where he was hallucinating cartoon characters that weren't there.  No wonder he didn't want his facial features present for the Roger Rabbit comics, which replaced his role with the novice detective Rick Flint who, unlike his predecessor, had little to no knowledge of toons, and had to play catch-up in how they acted.  A more successful reiteration of crime prevention and toon logic was between Bonkers D. Bobcat and Lucky "Pickle" Piquel.  The Miranda episodes were lackluster, but it was the interaction between Bonkers and Piquel that were the highlight of the show.

If a Roger Rabbit sequel is attempted, the trick will be to present something that'll draw audiences back to the theaters, and make them stay there.  As attractive as the opening cartoon Something's Cooking was, it was never able to adequately replicate that maniac energy in later installments, which felt increasingly tired, and were attached to movies that audiences weren't primarily interested in.  That, and their repetitive formula of Baby in Trouble was wearing increasingly thin.  There's also the danger of creating a sequel that's as embarrassing as Gary K. Wolf's shameless attempt to cash in on the movie's popularity, completely contradicting the events in his first book.  The only "official" sequel done at the time of the movie's release was the comic The Resurrection of Doom, because of course, you can't have a sequel without a reoccurring villain, even if said villain died of in a fittingly karmic manner.  Disappointingly, rather than reveal the form of the red-eyed toon lurking underneath that rubber mask, Doom simply looked like a wild-eyed cartoonish version of Christopher Lloyd - not that much different from his human form.  As for how he came back, the weasels simply found an animation cel of him and revitalized him.  (The same weasels who died laughing, including the one who was kicked into the Dipmobile - who brought THEM back???)

The one saving grace was Roger's attempt to deal with the realm of limited animation.  If there ever were to be a theoretical sequel, this would be prime material ripe for the picking.  Especially in light of how animators are often told to tone down their animation in order to comply with the studio's recommendations.

July 1 - Canada Day  (Annoyingly enough, today's Final Jeopardy's question was on the Declaration of Independence)

July 4: Independence Day - Jacquin's Postulate on Democratic Government: No one's life, liberty or property are safe while the legislature is in session.

July 10: Murphy's first Corollary - Nothing is as easy at it looks.


July 16: First Atomic Bomb Tested 1945 - Hane's Law: There is no limit to how bad things can get.

July 20: First Men on the Moon 1969 - Bob's Law of Appliances: The repairman will never have seen your particular model before.

July 25 - Law of Life's Highway: If everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

July 28: World War I Begins 1914 - Darrow's Comment: History repeats itself.  That's one of the things wrong with history.

July 30 - Davis Law: If a headline ends with a question mark, the answer is "no."

A few days ago, I was watching an awful Science Fiction movie about alien breeding invaders intruding upon a world populace, as they are won't to do.  As usual, I was seeing it on fast-forward with subtitles to get through the mundane script and the familiar ebb and tide of the plot.  (Introduction of characters, sense of threat, threat confirmed, trying to convince skeptics, skeptics convinced in light of menance, staying alive while killing as many invaders as possible, you know the drill)  Though there was a particular moment that took me out of the mindless escapism of the implausible movie - where the character talked about the egg sac of the creatures.  Only, they called it an egg sack.  While there wouldn't seem to be much difference between the two, there's a significant distinctive meaning.  One's an organic being part of somebody's body, the other is man-made, separate for carrying things in.  Unless you're a kangaroo, you certainly wouldn't want to be seen going to the grocery with a sac in hand.  Especially with the term being closely associated with football, which is potentially painful.

This wasn't an isolated incident.  I've noticed that there were other instances where there would be an added "k" to the end of words that normally wouldn't need that added emphasis.  There are all kinds of sources abound on pet peeves of improper usage of punctuation, ranging from misuses of apostrophes to general confusion over there / their / they're.  I've never seen this particular grievance mentioned before, so I figured I might as well strike while the iron's hot.

Another thing that drives me nuts is how authority figures, upon feeling threatened, will give the order or command to sic their dogs / lawyers / committee upon whoever's giving them grief.  But they say they'll sick them, which would have a completely different consequence, giving the mental image of having these powerful people throwing up all over them, which could be considered intimidating in its own right.

On a similar note, when someone's feeling nervous or trying to conceal their facial expressions while playing poker or some equally high-stakes game, they can still be outed by subtle facial cues or otherwise imperceptible body language that they're completely unaware of.  Naturally, these undesirable consequences of tics and ticks can be very similar, considering the ramifications, but one is for sudden contained reactions under stress, while the other is parasitic invaders living on your body.  While the former could be considered a reason for the latter (scratching all the time), it's not the most common one.

So why does this kind of mistake keep cropping up?  My theory is that there are writers who use words from everyday speech while never noticing how it's spelt in the stories they're written in, and editors don't catch that mistake, being more on the lookout for more common spelling mistakes or story progression.  One example I can think of is where I saw a comic (which I can't find right now) where they were showing New Yorker lingo by having a cabbie in their usual method of talking to their customers with basic questions such as "Where to Mac?", and "What's the problem, Mac?" Only, they used the guy's name as Mack.  Saying "Where to Mack?" sounds closer to someone asking where they can score some smack, which, while plausibly where the customer wants to get a high, is probably not their intended destination.
To my mind, it's somewhat along similar lines of making silly mistakes in the English language, being only familiar with a select few words, and applying those rules to every other similar word on the spectrum.  It would be similar to my mangling human language, being only familiar with the written form, and not how it sounds, which due to the nature of the English language, isn't exactly instinctive.  For instance, I still have trouble believing that sword (sord) doesn't rhyme with "word", especially given the phrase "The pen is mightier than the sword".  As a result of not knowing how they're spoken, I wind up facing reaper cushions (repercussions) and become further ostrich sized (ostracized).

So how can we stop this spread of alarming spelling mistake additions?  The answer to that might ironically come from the ONE exception I've never seen have an added "K" for is the abbreviation for Doctor.  You hardly ever see anybody use the term Dock, since that's more for the short end of a pier, where you're likely to wind up if you don't dock your pay.  But that could very well be the result of Bugs Bunny's infamous catchphrase.  You'd certainly never see Spider-Man spouting something along the lines of :

However, if people start adding a "T" at the end, we're going to need another talk.

When legacy strips get carried on by replacements, there are two ways the comic can be carried out.  One is to carry on as faithfully to the material, staying straight to the formula, and allowing no room for creativity, lest the audience lose their devotion.  The other is to renovate and innovate events slightly while still maintaining an air of familiarity with the subject.  Either way, there are certain aspects that may be missed by ghost artist that were evident when the original author was doing their work.  There are just some things that the original creator founded that may not even occur to well-meaning copycats.  One of these things Dik Browne's successor seems to have forgotten was that every July 14th, there would be an annual celebration of the rare act of bathing the infamous viking, even as his day job meant that he would be terrorizing people.  The main point being, I suppose, that for one solitary day, Hagar is being terrorized by the populace.  (His wife doesn't count)

Of course, as you may have noticed, this date wasn't always an absolute.  Not unlike statuary holidays that are moved up and down depending on the circumstances.  There would be some notable exceptions where Hagar would be in situations where he had to take baths despite it not being anywhere close to July.  On one hand, this could be forgiven for historical inability to preserve dates and times of when certain memorable events happened, since they didn't have watches or a reliable calendar system.  On another hand, it's also an example of how a cartoonist can be restricted for following their own rules when the calendar refuses to comply with their schedule.  (I'm still disappointed with Garfield's inability to take advantage of uncelebrating the rare occurrence of his mosthated day, February Monday the 13th)  Here's an example where Hagar poses a compelling argument to preserve the conservation of water which could be put to better use in mid-April.

Whatever the cause, the incidence was rare enough to be considered celebratory enough to bring throes of adoring crowds to see the ritual happen.  If there were any refreshment, game or gift stands nearby, they probably would've been there to make a profit.

Considering that only a select few people actually gather to watch Hagar take a bath (which would be embarrassing enough in its own right), the holiday could be the closest equivalent to a sports festival with brief running commentary, right down to a play-by-play account, all done in the imagination of the onlookers, not that dissimilar to radio.  Only after Hagar finished his bath would the collective crowd feel relieved by the unbearable suspense of the inevitable result.  Sure everybody knows how it ends, but that feeling when an epic event has truly passed seems to be a universal theme worldwide.  Not unlike a New Year's baby replacing the Old Man Year.

So why was Hagar so reluctant to take baths anyways?  Could the very act of taking a bath be fraught with unimpeded dangers that would only become obvious in hindsight?  Could it be Hagar was accustomed to remain content in his own filth, being naturally acclimated to years of dirt piling up over his pores, much like macho lazy slobs who can't be bothered to waste their time on trivialities such as washing their hands?  Could it be that in the Middle / Dark Ages, washing was still considered a new foreign concept that would appear frightening to the point where the act of washing away invisible microbes no one could see was considered the rantings of quack doctors?

Or could the real reason be something more basic in the manner of survival?

I've written previously about various comics that were lazy enough to reuse comics over the years in the hopes that new audiences wouldn't notice.  In fact, the samples I've posted are actually a fraction of what I've shown so far.

However, there were a few comics that were almost but not quite faithful reproductions that were done with little to no variance.  In these, there were redrawings that had the basic layouts and body language, but were redone with new people.  In these, you'd have a slightly harder time finding similarities unless you were paying attention.  They certainly slipped by until I saw certain similarities in their form and function.

This next example was a little trickier, since not just the peasant was redesigned, but also the store clerk in the throwaway panels.
 

To counter Adam's reluctance in being a stay-at-home dad, there was Walter who was quite outspoken in his opinions and practically wore his expressions on his sleeve.  There was no attempt at subtlety with this guy.

This is an early installment when Adam used to enjoy doing housework, before he started getting used to lazing around.

Unlike the Wacky Neighbor who would crash the place or offer sage advice, Walter's main function seemed to be an intentional antagonist, constantly pushing Adam's buttons, and trying to cast doubt on his masculinity.

At most, his jibes could be considered a half-hearted attempt to preserve his insecurity and self-confidence.

Indeed, when left to his own devices, Walter appears to be completely incapable of being able to do basic survival such as cooking or shopping.

This may be the only comic that Walter's last name is ever mentioned. To all the other Walter Grubbs out there, you're welcome.

Despite trying to get along with his misogynist friend with his good-natured humour, Adam always managed to get him back somehow.


Somehow, even though Walter kept kidding Adam around with no end in sight and Adam giving deserved comebacks, the two of them still managed to get together (along with a bevy of other rarely-seen male friends) to participate in typical manly activities.

Fittingly enough, this last Sunday appearance (that I can find) perfectly encompasses everything that makes up Adam and Walter's relationship.

Aug 2: Wild Bill Hickock Shot During Card Game 1876 - Canada Bill's Motto: A Smith and Wesson beats four aces.

Aug. 8: London's Great Train Robbery 1963 - Munder's Corollary: Everybody who does not work has a scheme that does.

Aug. 11 - Priestler's Law of Desire: The more you want it, the quicker the letdown after you get it.

Aug. 13 - Jones' Law of TV Programming: If there are only two shows worth watching, they will be on at the same time.

Aug. 19 - Sattinger's Law: It works better if you plug it in.

Aug. 21 - Suazo's Observation: Middle age happens when the chest and stomach start occupying the same parts of the body.

Aug. 24 - Mt. Vesuvius Erupts 79 AD. - Young's Law: All inanimate objects move just enough to get in your way.

Aug. 27 - Sintetos' Law of Consumerism: A 60-day warranty guarantees the product will self-destruct on the 61st day.

I've just recently found out that yesterday was World Cat Day, which seems appropriate since the internet seems tailor-made to support cat-related sources such as amusing cat videos and Cat Memes.  One of the most recent links that seems to have exploded in popularity is Confused Cats Against Feminism, which is a parody of the typical male reaction to anything that potentially threatens male privilege.

While most contributors would no doubt be submitting plenty of funny and cute stuff, I thought I'd make mine more closer to my heart by combining two of my favorite stories - one from the sadly offline ex.org, the source of early online Anime fandom essays, and the other by Émile Franc from 2000 Comic L'association, an anthology consisting of 2000 pages of silent comics from various cartoonists all over the world, usually having the new millennium as a theme.  Normally, you'd think that having a book consisting of nothing but pictures would be an easy and quick read, but since the stories are all done by various artists, the comics all have different amount of pacing, which amounts to having to implement lots of careful "reading" without any helpful words to help propel the action along.  If you're having trouble understanding what happens, there's a handy cheat sheet at the bottom.  Seriously, you should try re-reading it multiple times to really get it.

As for the story below, I changed around the order of some of the opening paragraphs so they'd be closer to the relevant pages, but otherwise, nothing's really changed.

The Cat who Lived a Million Lives:

There was a cat who could live for a million years.
He died a million times, and lived a million times.
He was a great tiger-striped cat.
A million people adored the cat,
And a million people cried when that cat died.
The cat never cried, not even once.

Once, the cat was a king's cat.
The cat hated the king.
The king was great at war, and was always at war.
And, he put the cat in a magnificent cage,
And took him out to war.
One day, the cat was hit by a flying arrow, and died.
The king embraced the cat and wailed during the battle.
The king stopped the war and returned to his castle.
And, he buried the cat in the castle's garden.

Once, the cat was a sailor's cat.
The cat hated the seas.
The sailor took the cat to all the seas of the world,
And all the ports of the world.
One day, the cat fell off the boat.
The cat could not swim.
The sailor hurriedly scooped up the cat with his net,
But the cat was soaked and dead.
The sailor embraced the cat which was now like a wet rag,
And wailed in a loud voice.
And, he buried the cat under the tree
In a park in a far-away port.

Once, the cat was a burglar's cat.
The cat hated burglars.
The burglar walked quietly through the dark town with the cat,
Just like a cat.
The burglar robbed only houses with dogs.
While the dog was barking at the cat,
The burglar opened the safes.
One day, the cat was bitten to death by the dog.
The burglar embraced the cat with the diamonds he stole,
And walked through the night town wailing in a loud voice.
Then, he went home and buried the cat in a small yard.

Once, the cat was the cat of a lonely grandmother.
The cat hated grandmothers.
The grandmother looked outside every day from a small window,
Holding the cat in her arms.
The cat was asleep all day on top of the grandmother's lap.
Time passed, and the cat died of old age.
The frail grandmother embraced the frail dead cat,
And cried all day.
The grandmother buried the cat under a tree in the yard.

Once, the cat was the cat of a magician in a circus.
The cat hated the circus.
The magician put the cat inside a box every day,
And cut him in half with a saw.
Then, he removed the cat, still in one piece,
Out of the box to receive his applause.
One day, the magician made a mistake,
And really cut the cat in half.
The magician wailed in a loud voice,
Holding the two parts of the cat in each hand.
Nobody applauded him.
The magician then buried the cat behind the circus tent.

Once, the cat was a little girl's cat.
The cat hated children.
The girl piggy-backed the cat, and slept clutching the cat.
When she cried, she wiped her tears on the cat's back.
One day atop the girl's back,
The holster to keep the cat secure wound around his neck,
And the cat died.
Holding the cat with the dangly neck, the girl cried all day.
And, she buried the cat under a tree in the yard.

The cat had no fear of dying.

Once, the cat wasn't anyone's cat.
He was a stray cat.
The cat was able to be his own cat for the first time.
The cat loved himself.
Since he was a great tiger-striped cat,
He became a great stray cat.

All the female cats wanted to be the cat's wife.
There were cats that gave him huge fish.
Others gave him premium mice.
Some cats brought rare catnip as a gift.
Other cats licked his tiger fur for him.
The cat said to all of them—
"I've died a million times! This is so ridiculous now!"
The cat loved himself more than anyone else.

But there was just one beautiful white cat
That didn't even look at the cat.
The cat went over next to the white cat, and told her,
"I died a million times!"
The white cat just said, "Oh."
The cat became slightly upset, since he loved himself.
The next day, and the day after that,
The cat went over to the white cat and told her,
"You haven't even finished one life."
The white cat just said, "Oh."

One day, the cat did three somersaults in front of the white cat,
and said, "I once was a cat for a circus."
The white cat just said, "Oh."
The cat started to say, "I have had a million—"
Then asked the white cat, "Can I be at your side?"
The white cat said, "Yes."
The cat stayed by the white cat for a long time.

The white cat had many cute kittens.
The cat no longer dared to say "I have had a million—"
The cat loved the white cat and all the many kittens
Even more than himself.

As time passed, the kittens grew up and all went away.
The cat, satisfied, said, "They became great stray cats now."
The white cat said, "Yes," and softly purred her throat.
The white cat had become a grandmother cat.
The cat purred his throat even more softly.
The cat thought that he wanted to live forever with the white cat.

One day, the white cat quietly stopped moving next to the cat.
The cat cried for the first time in his life.
Night came, morning came,
Night came again, and morning came again.
The cat cried a million times.
Morning came, night came—
and one afternoon, the cat stopped crying.
The cat, next to the white cat, quietly stopped moving.

The cat never came back to life again.

—HYAKUMANKAI IKITA NEKO
The Cat Who Lived a Million Times


1900-1917:  A mother cat is found to have too many babies, and has her litter dumped in the river.  One solitary survivor is retrieved from a rescuer downstream, and lives fairly free until while wandering a battlefield, gets its neck snapped in a noose of barbed wire, much to the soldiers' pleasure.

1917-1922:  Is part of the high socialist's society, and while the owner is preoccupied with a romantic liaison with her fiance, walks precariously alongside the balcony window until unwittingly pushed off.

1922-1936:  Gets caught up in a gang war of musicians who keep assault weapons in their guitar cases, and winds up a casualty of friendly fire.

1936-1943: Is part of a family couple, until spied by a butcher while climbing one roof too many, and is knocked off by a slingshot and sold for meat.

1943-1960:  Lives an uneventful life with a married couple well into their retirement years, which goes to show that a boring life may not be all that bad.

1960-1969: Lives with a rich carefree family with little responsibility over their children to the point where some boys cut the cat open just for fun.

1969-1975: Lives with a couple that later becomes part of a Hippie society, and is crucified on a tree as a warning to others.

1975-1990: Roams the highways until tempted with drugged food and sent to a laboratory and then experimented on until it's outlived its usefulness.

1990-2000: Is part of a large group of friends for a decade until dying of natural causes, and a seance is held  and a proper grave is contributed in honour of its previous lives.

Last week, the world was shocked when renowned actor Robin Williams committed suicide.  There was further outpouring of grief when it was further revealed that the man had been battling depression.
In the end, he faced his inner demons and lost.

Anecdotes have come up ranging from giving shout-outs to neglected people in the movie industry to hiring homeless people to help with movies.  As much as everybody's been reminiscing his roles in his movies, including the few rare instances where he played against type in more serious roles, the fact remains that he wasn't always as highly regarded as people remember.  There was an article (which I can't find right now) which pointed out that Robin Williams had a tendency to do a repeat of his stand-up routine, long after he'd already proven his worth.  In Good Morning Vietnam, he played a fast-talking radio jockey with perchance for doing funny voices, in Ferngully, he voiced a rapping experimentative fruit bat with various voices, in Mrs. Doubtfire, he applied for a job interview by - surprise, surprise - rattling off various funny celebrity voices.  The article likened him to an annoying uncle who repeated his favorite party tricks, regardless of whether the family was tired of them or not.

It also didn't help that he tended to play Man child roles, such as in Hook, Jumanji, Jack and Toys.

His self-esteem was such that he clearly didn't think that he played that big a part in Aladdin (despite being a scene-stealer in every part he played in) and asked that they downplay his presence in favor of the other voice actors, feeling that they deserved equal attention.  He was also against using his animated form for being a huckster shell for selling stuff, which was against his ethics.  So he was dismayed when he saw the promotional poster of the movie displaying Genie as the largest character there.  This led to a falling out with Disney, and the part of Genie was replaced by Dan Castellaneta for the sequel and TV series, and only came back after a formal apology for the 3rd sequel, Prince of Thieves, which Roger Ebert noted, had the same plot as another movie, Kazaam.

Much of Genie's appeal came from Robin William's improvisation, over 30 hours worth (which greatly inspired the animators) for a 90-minute movie, which unfortunately, led to a plague of rapid-talking funny mascots in later Disney movies, when they weren't really needed.  Later Celebrity voice actors simply couldn't duplicate the amount of comedic off-script material that made Aladdin a success.  In some cases, they might have been better off not trying.  (I'm looking at you Eddie Murphy)

So far, the most scathing recent criticism was for the 25th anniversary of Dead Poets Society which was heavily lambasted for not understanding the literature of poetry and effectively teaching independent thought free of the teacher's influence despite the fact that the message of the movie was to enthuse the students with inspiration by going off the usual beaten path and being an influence to make studying seem interesting.

But all these are just symptoms after the cause.  Actors have been heavily criticized for their crutch shticks before and have coped by falling back on money and publicity.  The most likely trigger was the cancellation of his last TV show The Crazy Ones.  Despite starring an all-star cast and director David E. Kelly, it couldn't save the tired formula and cliched father/daughter relationship from appearing boring.  Even having an episode pre-empted in an Elementarytime slot wasn't enough to garner interest in the show.  Just simply playing to his comedic strengths wasn't enough - it needed the same kind of heart that Robin Williams was fond of doing in passing, and it's hard to do that authentically.  With all the stories told of how funny he was behind the scenes, particularly between takes of serious movies (such as One Hour Photo, where the actors struggled to retain their composure), a better concept would've been of an over-the-hill actor doing comedic bits between takes before going back on set.  It would've fit his role perfectly.  One wonders if the kind of jokes he told were too risque for Friday Night television.

I was browsing through 1001 Comics You Must Read Before You Die, a brick of recommended essential reading material of comic paperbacks, hoping to chance upon a GN I came across in the mid-90s.  It had something to do with a sorcerer wanting to force his way into a paradise / utopia that was zealously guarded by women.  No matter what defenses they drew up, he effortlessly managed to shoot them all down with unerring accuracy and logic.  Then, once having reasoned his prowess, was just about to step through into Paradise when the leader made a last-ditch effort and relocated Paradise to somewhere at random that even she wouldn't know.  From that point on, people all over the world started to feel the effects of the removal of Paradise, and feeling uneasy without knowing why.  This led to various long-winded conversations between people everywhere and the creation of a log cabin.  Although it was drawn in a fairly realistic style, it was still somewhat amusing.  The general weirdness of the premise and lack of any central main character might have something to do with its obscurity.  If there's anybody out there who has any idea of what I'm describing, please let me know.

Anyways, getting back on topic, I was going through the collection of comic titles, when I came across an item that was familiar to me.  It was something I'd borrowed from the library - Bosnian Flat Dog, which despite its horrific sketchy drawings,, is actually a loose autobiography of a group of cartoonists in a land of Kafkaesque proportions.  A major plot point consists of following trails of ripped out diary pages about having the mummyfied body of Marshal Tito stuffed in a refrigerator and an underground ice cream network.  (It's weirder than it sounds)

At the time, I didn't think much of the cover, figuring it was typical of the nightmarish world they were living in.  But when I looked up the title, the reference page gave the larger image, which showed what I'd been missing:

It got me thinking about other covers that were cropped for the sake of convenience.  The most infamous example I can think of is CMX's conservative editing of Tenjho Tenge, a fairly fanservicy Manga, dealing with violence and breasts, This was somewhat surprising, considering how the company would later try to aim for fanservice with more risique S-hero titles.  (I suppose if the creators and commercially licensed characters are American, you can get away with pandering to your fetishistic fanbase, rather than branch out to potential new audiences)  In addition to releasing their early volumes in stiff uneasy-to-turn papers, it pretty much poisoned the well for the company's reputation.  But apparently, it's not the only instance of slightly modifying the cover to make it more mainstream.

Back when Frank Miller wasn't as crazy as he is now, and wasn't pining for the world of 1940's gangsters, he was expressing admiration for the world of manly Manga, where muscle-bound men would prevail against formidable opponents while weeping openly.  He showed this by drawing the covers for the first twelve issues of First Comics edition of Lone Wolf & Cub, which were later reprinted out of order for the Dark Horse collections.

What was left out of the cover for "The Gateless Barrier" where the assassin-for-hire manages to train himself mentally to be able to slay a living Buddha is the shocked expression of the lone man in the crowd.  That little extra detail made the dramatic moment more amusing than it should've, which is probably why he was cut out.

This extends to reprintings of children's books as well.  One of my favorite examples, The Church Mice series has been through various reprintings with various publishers, and different covers.

This reviewer may be more lenient with the reprint, being happy just to have the recent classic available, but I'm far harsher, particularly with the removal of some images from the first printing, and the treatment of dumbing down the original text.

For anyone curious about the missing images, as well as how the front and back covers looked, a comprehensive display can be found here:

In some cases, it may be a cultural thing, depending on what is considered more important.  The English version of Annie Sullivan and the Trials of Helen Keller had the girl and her teacher in a tree, putting the characters foremost onto the cover up front.

But the French edition of the same comic gave a much wider scope of their surroundings.

Before we get all high and mighty about such things, the French market doesn't always get the right end of the shiny stick.

Casterman's reprinting of English titles has them changed to conform to a consistent line of comic covers that have the characters cast against a blank background.  It makes them thematically similar, but also somewhat dulls the overall exterior appearance.

Some Mangas even go the similar route as well.  Kaoru Mori's Otoyomegatari (A Bride's Stories) was faithfully reprinted (in hardcover with cover flaps) by Yen Press to the delightment of her fans.

Whereas, the French edition went by completely whitewashing the lushly drawn background details, as well as the accompanying back cover art.

Considering the amount of outcry Manga fans over here get when details of their favorite titles get mangled or slightly manipulated with, you'd think there'd be similar outcry on the other side of the ocean.  Either there isn't that much publicity or overanalysis compared to over here, or there hasn't been much publicity involved, or maybe they have slightly different priorities, being happy just to have a title available.  Does anybody have any idea what constitutes a scandalous change over there?

Remember?  Remember?  The Labours of September
The Fun Tower Season and Plotz.
I know no reason why Fun Tower Season
Should ever be forgot.

Some drunk British guy mangling the verses to the Guy Fawkes poem

Sept. 2 - Labor Day - Worker's Dilemma:1. No matter how much you do, you'll never do enough. 2. What you don't do is more important than what you do do.

Sept. 5 - J.S. Gillette's Dictum:The only labor worth laboring for is a labor of love.

Sept. 11 - Evans' and Bjorn's Law:No matter what goes wrong, there is always somebody who knew it would.

Sept. 17 - Vanessa Williams Crowned Miss America 1983. Later Resigns 1983 - The Rockefeller Principle: Never do anything you wouldn't be caught dead doing.

Sept. 20 - Jimmy Carter's "Lusted in my Heart" Remark 1976 - Kaiser's Comment:Never open a can of worms unless you plan to go fishing.

Sept. 22 - U.S. Post Office Established 1789 - Laws of Postal Delivery:1. Important mail arrives late. 2. Junk mail arrives the day it was sent.

Sept. 26 - Rennie's Law of Public Transit:If you start walking, the bus comes when you are halfway between stops.

There's been some kind of meme going around with the following theme:  In your status, list 10 books that have stayed with you in some way. Don't take more than a few minutes, and don't think too hard about it. They don't have to be the "right" books, or great works for intellectuals, just ones that affected you in some way. As chain letters go, you could hardly do worse.

After looking back over my list, they're all stories that deal with alienation in some way.  Comprehensive notes for the stories are as follows:

1. The young adult books of Gordon Kormon

The Canadian writer got his start with the troublemaking duo Bruno and Boots at MacDonald Hall boarding school, long before Harry Potter made such administrations seem appealing.  Interestingly enough, I wasn't a big fan of his works at first, but that was because I was in a small classroom with other orally deaf students, and the teacher made us read The War with Mr. Wizzle in a slow and methodical manner, making sure that we understood the material, effectively cutting off the joy of quickly reading and absorbing the story naturally.
She was technologically sound, but it really wasn't to my taste.  Oftentimes, her teaching methods and my learning ability were at odds with each other.

Since my only consensus in doing a book report was to hit all the checkmarks of what was required (what I liked, what I disliked, what the story was about), I hardly paid attention to the little details that were part and parcel of the story, such as what the book was about.  If I'd had a more concrete example to work from instead of having to rely on my internal critic, my reports would've been more organic and fluid instead of static.  As such, I wasn't able to really enjoy Gordon Kormon's stuff until later, far away from the prying eyes of literary critics whose only modus operandi is to overanalyze the text to the point of removing all joy from reading.  Of course, it's doubtful I would've been able to accurately give specific reviews to my teacher's liking, since I had (and still do) have a tendency to remain maddeningly vague and elusive about certain plot details out of an irrational fear for not spoiling the story for anyone who isn't already intimately aware of the details.  It's why I only look up reviews of comics, books and movies after I've already become acquainted with the subjects in question, so I can have my opinion verified, and even get an alternate look if my POV doesn't match the majority opinion.

Ironically, many of the technological concerns that were present in The War with Mr. Wizzle, such as having a computer rely for printout of data, or limited number of letters for names are charmingly anachronistic and outdated today.  These were modified to incompatible technology in later updated reprintings.

But it was Gordon Korman's attempt at youth literature aimed at an older audience that I consider among his strongest works, such as Don't Care High, an apathetic school rediscovering its long-forgotten school spirit, Son of Interflux, a rivalry between the businessman of a successful company of useless (yet essential items) and his artist wannabe son, A Semester in the Life of a Garbage Bag, an unlucky student fastidiously scheming to get an all-paid vacation to a Greek island of reputed luck, and my personal favorite, Losing Joe's Place, the madcap adventures of a guy and his two friends doing everything they can to keep his brother's apartment from leasing over Summer Vacation.  Don't Care High is actually the weakest of his attempts, but still got marks for the portrayal of the future School President Mike Otis.  Chosen completely at random, the boy is someone who speaks in monosyllables, never changes his outfit of a plastic pink raincoat with diaper pins regardless of weather, and drives a modified fancy car that doesn't exist on the market.  His most frequent saying to anything is "There are a lot of things at this school I don't understand." Needless to say, I identified greatly with him, even though he hardly ever did anything.

2. The Wave by Todd Strasser

A true story about how a teacher's attempt to make his class more efficient wound up implicating a cult mentality throughout the school that bordered on frightening.  I later found out it was the novelization of a movie that was originally intended to be an After School Special back when they weren't just regulated to preachy moralistic shows,

The story was powerful enough to be remade into a German movie, which compressed the events into a week, which some critics expressed disbelief that a school would fall victim to fascism so quickly.  Interestingly enough, the events that inspired the book and movie actually occurred over the course of five days, which goes to show that truth is stranger than fiction.

It showed me how people were successible to peer pressure, and got me interested in cult mentality, such as Moonwebs.  I figured at least *I* would be immune, since such cults would require constant intervention from people, constantly exposing new ideas without time to develop or explain them, and I'd need time to process everything I was being told, and make sure I understood everything clearly, which would require constant repetition.

However, despite not falling prey to peer pressure, I still fell for propaganda of an unintentional source.  When I watched Transformers (sans close-captioning) at a friend's house, which aired the Jetfire episode, where a strong transforming robot put up a good fight before deciding to switch teams, and winds up sacrifing himself in the process.  Despite not hearing anything, I was able to easily identify sides, and could determine who the leaders were.  However, when I picked up a copy of the Transformers Marvel comics, I was surprised to find out that the Autobots were the good guys, and the Deceptions were the bad guys.

The reason being - I didn't trust Optimus Prime, because I couldn't see his lips.  (Beast Wars would've made that irrelevant)  Moreover, their logos were at odds with each other - the Autobots looked like they were crying, while the Deceptions were smiling.  As a kid, I was still operating under the illusion that "only bad guys die".  It was a sobering realization, and since then, made it a point to not make rash decisions on deciding who the good and bad guys really were.

Even the Marvel comic was confused, getting Ratchet's logo wrong.

And yet, I still got taken in by the misdirection of the Israeli / Palestein conflict, and in 20th Century Boys.
Even in the best of times, no one is immune from outside influences.

3. Matilda by Roald Dahl

A gifted young girl whose speciality is in reading miles ahead of her age group.  Although I wasn't much for most of her choice of reading material, she was the first literary character who's defining interest was in books.  This, more than the elaborate pranks she'd play on her less than intellectual family and her brief psychic powers were what spoke most to me.  Interestingly enough, the first draft was dramatically different, fully focusing on the child's pranks, and winding up using her telekinesis to manipulate a horse race, sacrificing her life in the process.

4. The Teahouse of the August Moon

I first read it before I even knew it was made into a movie or play.  What particularly impressed me was how much... SLOWER the Oriental's lives were compared to the hyperactive fast-paced storytelling of American media.  Their values seemed completely at odds with what we ordinarily think of as normal, and yet made a kind of sense from their POV.  It was among the first of many stories that got me interested in Japanese culture as a whole.


5. The short story "Mazelife" from Monkey Brain Sushi

Monkey Brain Sushi was a collection of Japanese short stories, some of which were excepts of longer novels.  There even was Japan's Junglest Day, a stiffly drawn Manga about WWII Army refugees, a talking canteen and a space alien collecting for charity debating philosophy about the nature of misery.  (Even among Manga concepts, it's kinda weird)

The most memorable story is Mazelife by Kyoji Kobayashi.  It chronicles a man known only as "K" (a possible allusion to Kafka's other hapless protagonists, but more likely an extension for the author's acronyms) who is tired of having to go through life being confronted with human feelings, so he develops (or tries to) a computer program to simplify his life into a system of computer codes that can be systematically followed.  However, this proves to be far more difficult than he thought, since every possible permutations for doing something as simple as preparing a sandwich would result in thousands of binary circuits (not counting the option of eating said sandwich, and how to eat it)  So he decides to simplify his life further by devoting it to a God.  But WHICH God?  As borderline obsessed K is with trying to find the perfect God to worship, the choice he winds up making turns out to bite back on him HARD in the end.

It's a rare work that has the courage to start (and maintain) a humourous tone throughout, and completely subvert that into a rather depressing ending.  Fully putting your life in someone else's hands is just as disastrous as not wanting to take responsibility for your actions.

6. The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

During recess and lunch hours, I would spend my time not going outside, but standing around in the library carrying my heavy backpack which due to its weight and pressure, was not considered a back problem, but my only source of comfort.  In one of the rare moments of intervention between me and my Resource teacher (a teacher for deaf students like me), I was told numerous times that I looked odd simply standing there, but I paid no mind - I felt comfortable, and that was all that mattered.

At the time, I was still largely ignorant of the library cataloging system, and mainly browsed the titles on the shelves willy-nilly, hoping to come across something that seemed interesting.  While checking the category under humour using library catalogue cards (they still existed back then), I came across a collection that was listed with the subgenre of Science Fiction.  I'd always been interested in Sci-Fi, despite only catching brief episodes of Star Trek Next Generation, but hadn't latched upon the idea that something that was based on outlandish scientific ideas could also be funny as well.

Everyman Arthur Dent perfectly captured the essence of someone being constantly out of his comfort zone at all times (even though he hardly did anything in the books), which was explained patiently in a patronizing manner by Ford Prefect who brought him along for reasons unknown.  But it was Marvin the Paranoid Android I really warmed up to.  I was beginning to develop a rather cynical and pessimistic worldview, and there was this robot showing off its ability to overdramatize the pure awfulness of the universe in an understated manner.

He even did the Ice Bucket challenge long before everybody else started daring themselves to. He hardly even had to be coerced into doing it in the first place.

Thanks to him I was able to define myself as a Pessimistic Positive Nihilist.  Somebody who only sees that behind every Silver Lining, there's a Cloud, yet won't hesitate to describe the bleakness as absurdly as humanly possible.  Therby giving proof to the lie that there ain't no double negative that can't not be disagreed against.  Never simply say "yes", when two "no"s, will do.  Mathematically, it all works out in the end.

7. Battle Angel Alita

While I was beginning to embrace my inner pessimist, there was another aspect of myself that I was beginning to grow increasingly uncomfortable with.  My head was increasingly filled with thoughts of an uncomfortable nature, and I noticed that my tastes were dramatically different from everyone else's.  This wasn't just a cause of being contrary to everybody (though that certainly played a part), I simply couldn't relate to anybody that was around me that wasn't my sister who shared my common interest of comics.

Originally, I wasn't going to include any comics in my list, until I saw that others had titles such as Maus and Watchmen on them.  Since only long-length narratives applied, this would leave newspaper comics off, though if the daily funnies were allowed, Calvin & Hobbes would be at the top of my list.  (Other influential contenders being For Better or for Worse, Fox Trot and Herman)

I was feeling increasingly despondent and disconnected from everyone.  There were things that everybody liked that were completely anathema to me, and there were things I was obsessed with that no one else seemed to share.  In fact, I was scared of how much I related to Anime and Manga at the expense of everything else, including homegrown entertainment.  I had trouble relating to anyone to the point where I began to doubt that I was even capable of being good.  I started shoplifting junk foods I didn't want to pay for in a conscious desire to be caught and rightly punished for my misdeeds.

I'd only come across the Manga series at various intervals in bookstores, which were full of gore and violence with a philosophical bent, reading the 4th, 2nd and 6th volumes in that order.  The nature of the landscape and setting changed so much through its run that I thought they were three individual Manga titles starring post-apocalyptic fighting girl robots.  I thought the genre was popular enough for it to spawn worthy imitators.  In fact, considering the popularity of endearing kick-ass fighting teenage girls, it's surprising it hasn't become more widespread.  (Characters such as Cassandra Cain and CammyWhite wound up being spiritual influences though.)

Coming across the serialization of the later volumes came at a turbulent time in my life when I had serious doubt about my self-worth, and hit enough intellectual and emotive points that I thought were already beyond saving someone as wretched as myself.  Knowing that there was somebody - even a fictional character - that would embrace warped ideals while simultaneously being revolted by them was as close to relief I got.  It helped me feel better about myself.


8. Flowers for Algernon

Although comparably smart in High School, I still had trouble relating to people, and understanding basic social concepts beyond saying "Hello" upon greeting, and not much idea of what to say afterwards.  One of the main reasons I read varied Manga was to get a wider range of insight into people's minds.  Despite this, I was extremely ignorant about the internal racial hatred and race relations that existed in the South, and being confronted with the kind of warped logic makes me start thinking unwelcome thoughts that make me uncomfortable to confront.  I even had to be taught why somebody called the N-word on Degrassi was such a big problem, and would've felt completely out of my element reading the book, since at the time, the movie wasn't even captioned.

The English teacher seeing that I was struggling with understanding the theme, suggested an alternate Sci-fi novel more to my taste, and I immediately took to it like a fish to water.  The idea of a retarded man undergoing a surgical process to become smarter was something I could relate to, more than the subtle undertones that would've surely gone over my head.

To this day, I've watched the movie starring Atticus Finch, but have yet to read the book, despite knowing that there additional details that were left out.  I keep telling myself I should give it a try someday, but can never manage to make enough motivation or time to do so.  It's one of those classics that everybody likes to keep on their shelves, but never actually go out of their way to read.  I'd rather have my shelves groan with titles I'm immensely vested in, rather than titles I've never even cracked the spines of.

9. An Anthropologist on Mars by Oliver Sacks - namely the section with Temple Grandin.

When I graduated from Grade School to High School, it was a major transitional issue.  I was indoctrinated into a new routine with multiple teachers instead of just one, and mainstreamed into a regular school with other students.  Most of the other deaf students who I'd grown up with lived in other parts of town, and we were spread out all over the province.  Only a few came to the same High School as I did.  Over time, anybody I could talk to was systematically taken away from me. One friend from moved to another province after two years.  The remaining friend from my Grade class was monopolized by a deaf girl from the same class.  She wasn't even romantically interested in him, and I found it increasingly difficult to get a chance to talk to him alone.  On the rare occasions where I could manage to get some time together to talk briefly, we were followed everywhere - including inside the boy's bathroom!

Moreover, I was relentlessly taunted and teased to the breaking point.  When I tried to point out these hecklers to my Resource teacher, I was dismissed and told that they were just playing around.  I had to mentally force myself to enjoy being left alone, otherwise I would've been crushed by the loneliness.  I grew increasingly frustrated to the point where when the deaf girl was leaning in front of an open window on the second floor, I simulated pushing her out with my hands, without ever getting close.

Although she didn't see me, the rest of the class did, and I was reprimanded for my actions, even though I hadn't done anything wrong.  There was also an incident where I hovered a heavy vice from woodshop over her head, which may have been an additional factor that made people nervous.

These actions and more earned me a trip to the Principal's office where I was completely unable to convincingly give a reason for my seemingly violent actions, and was suspended for three days.  On the way to my parent's car, I voiced out my frustrations with the deaf girl which I was unable to say in the presence of a crowd of adults all against me.

It never occurred to me to actively talk about my problems at home, since in my mind, the two were separate from each other.  The only connection between school and home was homework - anything else would be bringing more of the former into the latter, and I didn't want to bring more memories of what happened home with me.

During my puberty years, I was too intimidated to even consider taking time out of my schedule to go see a psychologist, who attempted to relieve my tension by coming to my house on a regular basis.  I could never understand why anybody would want to stay after school.  To me, that was the equivalence of having extra homework time that could be better put to doing actual homework.  I was more concerned with rushing out of class as soon as the last bell rang in order to catch the bus going to the metro, otherwise I'd have to stay with the rest of the rowdy teenagers teeming, pushing and shoving each other in a vain attempt to make room for themselves.  Within the crowded confines of a later bus, I developed a fear of crowds, and by extension, people in general.  To this day, I'm still intimidated from being around children, because they're generally unpredictable in their behavior, and I'm always worried that I'll either say or do something that'll impress upon their impressionable little minds.

One day, this psychologist gave me what looked like a routine questionnaire, consisting of hypothetical situations such as how a person would react under certain situations.  This was a welcome change from trying to get me more accustomed to feeling fabrics that made me uncomfortable, since I always tended to overthink these sessions, so I gladly gave my logical answers.

A few days later, it was revealed to me that I had Asperger's Syndrome.  It turned out that my psychologist had found the then-unknown syndrome while looking up information for another client, and found that they perfectly matched my way of thinking.

My general reaction to finding out I had Asperger's was, "I KNEW it!  I always knewthere was something different about me!" Suddenly the multiple factors, such as never quite fitting in with the crowd, having ultra-sensory issues to mild touch, and revulsion to everyday elements made sense to me.  I finally had an answer to why I always seemed off-kilter from everybody else.  There was a scientific mental reason, it had a name, and all the symptoms matched my way of thinking.

Memory can be a funny thing.  At the time, I went around proudly telling anybody close to me within earshot that I had Asperger's, my Relations teacher was going through a bad divorce, and wasn't feeling particularly sympathetic for my cause.  He wound up betraying my trust by siding with the deaf girl, because he felt that my symptom was just an excuse for my actions.  As a result, I was convinced to hide my diagnosis as so not to be labeled with being overly violent.

Somewhere in my field of logic, I decided to keep my symptom a secret, partially so I could use it as a story element in an upcoming Novel I'd write, having the relatively obscure symptom revealed to the world, not unlike Michael Crichton's Velociraptors getting a sudden boost in popularity.  Though on that front, I've probably waited too long.  The other more plausible reason was that I wanted to see if people would accept me for who I was before I revealed my disability to them.

10. The works of Neal Shusterman, such as "The Dark Side of Nowhere"

Ending on a lighter note, Neal Shusterman is well-renowned for creating Twilight Zone-esque stories that while seemingly far-fetched, are still within the grounds of plausibility.  The Eyes of Kid Midas is a cautionary tale about wish fulfillment with ever-escalating consequences.  The Shadow Club is another book about cult mentality spreading beyond its intended limits.  And there are collections of short stories that are as imaginative in their brevity.

Since I'm not that good at summarizing stories with multiple plot twists, I'll just say that The Dark Side of Nowhere takes place at a remote part of town where practically nothing interesting happens.  The protagonist, Jason, wonders why all the adults in his town is so enamoured with seemingly simple and boring non-events happening around them, such as breathing air and touching grass.  Perfectly mundane activities that would be among the level of excitement of seeing a documentary on watching painted grass dry.  The most interesting thing that happens is one of their classmates dying from a ruptured appendix.  From that point on, things only gradually grow more interesting than Jason ever intended, when he and a group of equally disfranchised teenagers are gathered to do some secretive training with fancy gloves, which would gradually reveal their true nature, and what their purpose really is.  As the old Chinese curse goes, "May you live in interesting times..."